• Clarke Wallace


We’re not talking about relationships and how we react to one another. It’s about ties we (mostly men) wear around our necks. Or used to. Me? Not that often.

Even when I do, I find myself staring into a mirror, my shirt collar up, top button buttoned. I ask myself “where do I start”?

There’s something that goes: “left over right and right over left.” At the moment it doesn’t help. It’s also at this moment that i feel a pair of hands reach from behind. It’s Rosanne.

“What do you want?” my wife asks? Straight or Windsor?”

It’s the straight knot that most men use when tying their ties. Wrap one side over the other and push it up into place. For me it’s only half a knot that ‘bend’ one way and looks uneven. Most men who wear suits or sport coats tie their ties with that single bend.

Confusing? Look in the mirror and find out if you always wear a tie that way.

How to make the whole thing look better is the Windsor knot. Here you wrap one side of the tie around the other and do it a second time on ‘the other side,’ if you get what I mean. What comes out is a pleasant knot that’s even on both sides.

Truthfully, I can’t remember the last time I tied a tie. Which is probably the same for many of us. Then there are those who wear a tie without thinking about not wearing one The more power to you.

I have a dozen ties hanging in my closet. They’re gathering dust. If I have a favorite, it would be the Wallace tartan one because it’s got character with its bright mixture of red and yellows.

Author’s comment: I didn’t mention the bowtie. A whole new dynamic here when tying one. It defies the imagination. Tie it yourself and it’s bound to look sloppy. Then again it gives you that look of someone with a sense of humor. That’s what life is all about.

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